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Welcome to my website: part vanity project, part unwarranted self-promotion, part ‘stops me drifting towards my natural inclination for murder’. I hope you’ll find something in these pages that makes you laugh, or leak some description of bodily fluids. I write about a broad range of nonsense, but most often find myself drawn to the absurdity of existence, parenting, and TV & film.
What others are saying about Jamie Andrew With Hands:
‘If I actually existed I’d go wild for this shit.’ – Jesus
‘If this website had been around a few years ago, maybe I wouldn’t have allegedly killed my wife. I didn’t kill my wife.’ – OJ Simpson
‘I didn’t kill my wife either, but I WOULD have if she’d tried to stop me from reading Jamie Andrew With Hands!’ – Dr Richard Kimble